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Wednesday, July 15, 2009

The Tuesday Top 10: Favorite Inbred Movies

I never quite realized just how many horror movies focus on inbreeding until I sat down to compile this particular list, a special request from a very special Vault Dweller. Apparently, there is much horror to be found in the illicit, deranged fruits of incestuous breeding. Can't say I can argue with that one. So without further ado, I give you some of the most infamous examples of horror flicks featuring wacked-out inbreds....

10. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986)
This collection of cannibalistic Longhorns has to take the cake as far as the homicidal families of horror go. And although this go-around wasn't as horrifying as their original appearance, it was a hell of a lot more graphic and gory, and depicted in awful detail just what this opportunistic family was capable of doing to make a buck in tough economic times...

9. Cabin Fever (2002)
Bizarre psycho rednecks are only tangentially involved in this tale of a flesh-eating virus run amok in the woods, but I would be remiss if I didn't mention it. I know I can't specifically prove that these particular backward yokels are in fact, inbred, but I say we can bend the rules just a bit to embrace the entire spectrum of deranged rednecks, ok?

8. Nightbreed (1990)
Speaking of homicidal country bumpkins who may or may not be the product of sibling sex, this underrated Clive Barker gem is rife with them. The bizarre mutants of the film are, in fact, nowhere near as warped and terrifying as the idiotic yet dangerous locals who come after them for a good ol' fashioned country mutant lynchin'!

7. Redneck Zombies (1987)
Speaking of rednecks, this film is filled with the undead variety. The reason? Well it seems that Jethro and Goober done accidentally hooked up the moonshine still to some nuclear waste. Yes, that's actually the plot. An early direct-to-video underground fave of the 1980s.

6. Lake Dead (2007)
Some money-hungry relatives descend on the property of a deceased relative, only to discover a gaggle of homicidal (and most likely inbred) psychos taking up residence inside. One of the early entries in the After Dark Horror-Fest.

5. Black Christmas (2006)
This inferior remake plays up the inbreeding angle, with our homicidal leading man, Billy, fathering a daughter with his own mother, and later trying to blind her after killing his mother and her lover. When Billy escapes the mental institution to get some closure with his sister/daughter, all holy hell breaks loose.

4. Spider Baby (1968)
The degenerate, multi-generational inbred Merrye family takes center stage in this chestnut. They're so messed up that their minds turn to mush as they approach adulthood, and they begin to do unspeakable things that must be covered up by their ever-loyal chauffeur. Proof that the gene pool needs a little chlorine every once in a while.

3. Wrong Turn (2003)
Just your basic, "young people being stalked in the woods by demented country inbreds" flick, this one nevertheless has some good scares and memorable effects--especially the infamous shovel-to-the-face. Oh yeah, and it takes place in West Virginia. The check from the WV Tourism Board is on the way, fellas!

2. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
Once again, the unforgettable collection of Leatherface, The Hitchhiker, Grandpa and the Old Man, rear their (extremely) ugly heads here to represent for seriously effed-up backwoods cannibals everywhere. This movie is an unassailable horror classic, and would easily get the number-one spot, if it weren't for...

1. Deliverance (1972)
Admit it, when you first read what this list was about, the first line that entered your head was "Squeal like a pig!" This movie has literally become synonymous with the dangers of backwoods America. Burt Reynolds, Tom Voight and Ned Beatty are three city slickers utterly terrorized by a gang of sodomizing wackjobs. But seriously, I think Gilbert Gottfried said it best--given the choice of having their way with any of these three guys, why in the hell would they choose Beatty? Just askin'...

18 comments:

WritRightWrote said...

wrong turn should have been a bit more realistic with their inbreds. their skin pigment is blue. even creepier.



Cabin fever 2. you excited for it?!

Andrew said...

Yeah..Wrong turn is very realistic...Keep going...


Thanks for sharing...


___________________
Andrew
The Best PRICE for the BEST ENTERTAINMENT

B-Sol said...

The only thing that worries me about Cabin Fever 2 is that Eli Roth wanted nothing to do with it. But I'll certainly be checking it out.

Anonymous said...

I love the list - great job. As inbreds is something that totally freaks me out. "Squeal like a pig" LMAO

BJ-C said...

*inserts banjo from deliverance here*

MacReady said...

Even though its not a feature length film, that episode of The X-Files with the inbred family was really creepy the first time I saw it. The baseball wielding brothers, the quadruple amputee mother under the bed, the burying of dead inbred babies in the back yard, creepy. I kind of wish they just made that last X Files movie about that family.

Matt Farkas said...

I'd trade the Black Christmas remake for Danny Steinmann's sexy/creepy The Unseen, but otherwise a fine list.

RayRay said...

It's movies like this that make me live by the credo: "Have shotgun, will travel."

Well done.

gord said...

@MacReady

Was just about to come in here and mention the X-Files episode (titled Home, from Season 4). It's easily my fave X-Files ep, and it blows all these other entries away.

BJ-C said...

@gord @macready

AMEN. its so disturbing.

B-Sol said...

Oh god, why do i NOT remember this ep??

I knew I needed to be more of an X-Files fan....

Dave said...

I'm kind of surprised to see something like Black Christmas '06 on here but neither version of The Hills Have Eyes.

B-Sol said...

Wow, how did I leave that one out?? Chalk it up to blogging at ungodly hours of the night, I guess....

Anonymous said...

We both even mentioned "The Hills Have Eyes". I didn't even realize it didn't make the list until it was just mentioned. LOL :)You obviously need more sleep :)

B-Sol said...

Tell me about it! I definitely wasn't fully conscious by the time I finished writing this one....

gord said...

B, I suggest you track down the X-Files ep in question (again, Home from Season 4) and check it out. It's a great stand alone ep, and a episode that doesn't require a lot of character backstory knowledge.

B-Sol said...

That's good--the one thing I couldn't take about that show was that it required so much backstory knowledge and there weren't enough standalone episodes.

movie scary said...

You just have to love it!!!!

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