For this, the momentous 500th POST for The Vault of Horror, I'm granting loyal Vault Dweller and fellow former WWE employee/commiserater Jonathan, a.k.a. "J-Rock", the spotlight. You see, inspired by last week's top 10 list of the most memorable old school VHS box covers, J-Rock dug into his own collection and procured a bunch of movies on tape that he had bought some years ago on the cheap when his local mom-and-pop video store went out of business.
And here today, I present to you the painstakingly scanned cover images that greeted me this morning in my inbox, courtesy of my good friend in horror...
God, I used to love covers like this. "Banned in 31 Countries". And dig that extended warning message on the bottom. How could you pass this one up?
And of course, the back cover--with an even better look at that priceless "warning". Twenty-four scenes of barbaric torture and sadistic cruelty. Count me in! Honey, heat up the popcorn!
Here's one I remember very well, with artwork that was an obvious knockoff of Fulci's Gates of Hell cover (or was it the other way around?) Serious flashback--thanks, John!
First runner-up for "Coolest Tagline for a Zombie Movie, Ever." Right behind, "We are going to eat you!"
A putrid gem of the much maligned yet oh-so-glorious Nazi zombie subgenre, soon to be revived thanks to Dead Snow. Kudos to you, Wizard Video, for your lack of distribution scruples. And John--$5.25, not a bad deal, my man.
If we are to believe the hype, then this could very well be the first direct-to-video horror movie. Don't know if these folks deserve to be commended, or euthanized.
Wow. That is one sweet cover, can't deny that. Who says horror is misogynistic??
Once again, thanks to J-Rock for this delicious cache of '80s VHS goodness. What better subject matter for my 500th post? I really can't even believe I've managed to write this much crap about horror movies in the past 19 months! Thanks goes out to all my loyal supporters who have helped make the VoH one of the cornerstones of the horror blogosphere--and here's to the next 500.