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Thursday, May 7, 2009

A Quarter-Century of Krueger: Favorite Elm Street One-Liners

When it comes to unforgettable one-liners, any horror fan will tell you the same thing. You can keep Henny Youngman--for spouting off classic lines, the bastard son of a hundred maniacs is your man. Freddy Krueger has coined enough zingers to earn him a regular gig on the Borscht Belt. Oh, and his co-stars aren't half bad either!

"This... is God."

"I'm your boyfriend now, Nancy!"

"You've got the body... I've got the brain."

"You are all my children now."

"Sorry, kid. I don't believe in fairy tales."

"This is it, Jennifer: Your big break in TV. Welcome to prime time, bitch!"

"What a rush!"

"How sweet. Fresh meat!"

"You shouldn't have buried me. I'm not dead."

"If the food don't kill ya, the service will."

"Welcome to Wonderland, Alice!"

"I... am... eternal."

"Kids... always a disappointment."

"Is she delicious... or am I CRAZY?"

"I'll get you, my pretty! And your little soul, too!"

"I didn't need a glove to kill your bitch OF A MOTHER... and I don't need one now!"

"Every town has an Elm Street!"

"Come here, my piggy. I've got some gingerbread for ya!"

"Being dead wasn't a problem, but being forgotten, now that's a BITCH. I can't come back if nobody remembers me. I can't come back if nobody's afraid. I had to search the bowels of Hell, but I found someone, someone who'll make 'em remember. He may get the blood, but I'll get the glory, and that fear is my ticket home."

"Everyone forgot. That's why they weren't afraid anymore. That's why I had to get Jason to kill for me to get them to remember. But now he just won't stop..."

And that's not all. A litany of memorable barbs from Mr. Krueger's supporting cast over the years...

"He's dead honey, because Mommy killed him."
--Marge Thompson

"I had a hard-on this morning when I woke up, Tina... Had your name written all over it."
"There's four letters in my name, Rod. How can there be enough room on your joint for four letters?"
"Hey, up yours with a twirling lawnmower!"
--Rod Lane & Tina Gray (thanks for the reminder, BJ-C!)

"What's the coroner got to say?"
"He's been in the john pukin' since he saw it."
--Donald Thompson and "Cop #3"

"Screw your pass!"
--Nancy Thompson

"God damn it, Kristen, you ruin everything! Every time I bring a man home you spoil it! You know what your shrink says? You're just trying to get a little attention!"
--Elaine Parker

"Sorry? Sorry that you and your tennis pals torched this guy and now he's after me? In case you haven't been keeping score, it's his fucking banquet! And I'm the last course."
--Kristen Parker

"And as adults, we must now prepare for our new life outside this wonderful environment known as Springwood High... So let's blow this pop stand!"
--Dan Jordan

"Dude, that goalie was pissed about something."

"Do you want some free advice? Coffee. Make friends with it."
--Mark Davis

Freddy cartoon by Montygog.


BJ Colangelo said...

You don't have my suggestion :( sad day B-Sol.

B-Sol said...

I do believe that momentary lapse has been corrected ;-)

Wings1295 said...

Love the Freeburg quote from "FvsJ".

Tower Farm said...

"Screw your pass" is one of the best movie lines ever. I use it all the time, befuddling everyone around me.

Anonymous said...

RayRay - "What a rush..." - the best line from the best kill from the best Elm Street, in my humble opinion. Glad I saw it there. Made me feel all warm o the inside.

Ya know, this little post reminded me how much fun the Freddie flicks are.

B-Sol said...

Glad to refresh your memory Ray. Now if only the new one can live up...

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